7 Days. 7 Actions: An Allyship Journey of LGBTQ+ inclusion

I’ve faced the fear of not getting it right as an ally. Has this stopped you from your journey of allyship (similar to me!), at least sometimes? It’s not that we don’t empathise or most people don’t want to be an ally - it’s just difficult if the thought of failure, groupthink, or hesitation overpowers us and shows up as moments of weakness in our journey as an ally to the LGBTQ+ community.

And yet, allyship wins if we start reflecting with compassion and honesty as to how different is another’s lived experience versus our own. ‘Privilege,’ a term that could be misunderstood - are there instances where we reverse-discriminate or undermine one’s experiences in the name of privilege? Perhaps.

And yet, privilege is power. Courage, Authenticity, Vulnerability and Empathy becomes easier with privilege for an ally. Shared below is an interesting statistic focused on intersectionality - (Source: McKinsey, Active Allyship: Do your LGBTQ+ employees feel supported and included?)

A sharp 1/3rd of LGBTQ+ employees surveyed reported experiencing a microaggression - talked over or interrupted at work in contrast to straight employees. However, this became progressively worse with intersectionality. Versus gay men, transgender employees and LGBTQ+ women, are more probable to face a microaggression.

Here’s a mini-journey, a snapshot on how to progress as an ally to the LGBTQ+ community irrespective of the extent of your privilege. The 7-day allyship challenge shared below can be a simple read, inspire intent to action, or extend as a year round allyship journey depending on one factor - You.

It is an invitation to build ally habits that could lead to something meaningful, whether you are deepening your ally journey or simply new.

Day 1:

Reflect on your Privilege:

Examine your identity in terms of diversity dimensions such as gender, ability, sexual orientation, etc. How are these dimensions impacting your daily interactions and beyond? An understanding of your privilege in relation to others could be a starting point in your journey.

Day 2:

Identify one Bias:

Unconscious bias is real and we all are impacted by it. Awareness could be your day 2 goal. Start small by confiding about how bias impacts daily interactions within your bias circle, a group of people you rely on to progress together.

Day 3:

Learn something New:

Day 3 can be about reading an article, listening to a podcast, or picking up a book based on the underrepresented voices from the LGBTQ+ community. (Link: BBC: 10 Ways to Be An LGBTQ+ Ally) Explore diverse perspectives to understand more.

Day 4:

Inclusive Communication:

Observe how conversations take place around you. Mindset -> Inclusive Communication -> Actions. Start with the why of gender pronouns, focus on inclusive language, and be mindful. Explore how belonging can “invite in” versus “coming out,” as an ally.

Day 5:

Pause and Intervene:

Dismissive comments or subtle microaggressions about one’s sexual orientation or gender identity can over time lead to a toxic work environment. On witnessing it, use phrases such as, “That’s simply not okay,” “That moment didn’t feel right, and let’s respect how people identify.”

Day 6:

Check in with a colleague:

Check in about instances of bias or exclusion. Heard. Seen. Felt - These three words can be the goal towards inclusion for LGBTQ+ colleagues. On noticing a colleague’s awkward silence at a meeting, reach out privately and ask, “How did that comment land with you? Hope you are doing okay.”

Day 7:

Commit to ongoing Allyship:

It doesn’t end with day 7. Commit to an allyship act such as:

A. An open dialogue about LGBTQ+ inclusion with someone new to this space

B. Connecting with people at a deeper level through forums, ERGs, etc.

C. Mindful about “outing” unintentionally

D. Confronting gender stereotypes

E. Amplify LGBTQ+ voices and lived experiences

Pick an allyship commitment for day 7 that seems to be best for you.

Although there could be so much more than the list above, remember to simply - ADDRESS -> AMPLIFY -> ADVOCATE. marginalised voices from the community. Acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community more than tolerance is a must in the ally journey.

More than getting it right the first time, focus on movement to prevent a complete stop of LGBTQ+ inclusion efforts. I thank you for reading this blog and would like to invite you to share your reflections and to sustain the momentum of LGBTQ+ inclusion year around beyond the mere Pride month focus or a 7-day challenge.